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it's such a sleepy day.

weather's freezing cold...

just nice to snuggle under the covers with a good book and hot chocolate.

but i'm working. bah.

i'll just imagine. haha =)

@ 11:18 PM

i swear i have a psycho-moto problem... either that, or i'm super gan jiong when i (try to ) drive. haha... my driving instructor and i usually end up laughing at my stupid mistakes when i drive. haha

i came home and lamented to my dad...

"why are u driving a manual car?"

he says...

"then you think so easy arh? sit in the back seat and enjoy..."

=(

but driving is fun la. =P

@ 8:25 AM

and these are the phones i've been eyeing lately...

the very sexy Nokia N76




and the very bee-you-tee-ful LG SHINE =)



and the platinum black version... very nice.


i'm guessing i wun be getting them anytime soon though. bleagh. peanuts intern pay. haha =)

@ 12:27 AM

at the end of the day, we just want someone to go home too. humans ARE social creatures. you cant live in solitude forever. u'll get tired, fall sick, get bored, want to speak to someone, want to interact with someone, want to tell someone u love him, and want to be loved back in return someday. and we all hope that someday actually arrives, someday.

watched asian boys today. it was good. the script was fantastic, like vol.2, and i really liked certain moments in it. what really struck a chord was how it's never been about being gay or straight, but that love IS essentially the same for everyone.

runs till sun! go watch!

@ 1:52 PM

SLEEPY

VERY

=(...

yongzhi's video made me quite happy though. he did one for sava too, but this one is like... 3 times longer, with so much more material and so much more thought-provoking =)

loves.

@ 1:36 AM

just sent my cousin off to brisbane. brings back a lot of memories when i left for vancouver too. suddenly thought of my hostel room there, my bed, the cool night breeze and the pretty snow prints we made =)

my dad was telling me how they drove to east coast, waited for the exact moment my plane was due to take off, and waved to that random SQ flight hoping it was the right one, all cos they couldn't see my boarding gate from the viewing gallery. i never knew. =)

so sweet hor? abit silly, but so so sweet =)

@ 9:04 AM

it's 4.15 in the morning.. and i'm feeling emo.

i love the feeling when i'm the only one awake in the dark of the night.

feels like time doesnt matter and daylight wont come.

sleep evades while the night engulfs me...

@ 1:03 PM

I miss rowing. says: (1:40:22 AM)

MABOO

I miss rowing. says: (1:40:27 AM)

i am suffering from serious withdrawal symptoms

I miss rowing. says: (1:40:33 AM)

:'(

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:41:50 AM)

you should my dear

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:41:53 AM)

you really should be

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:42:20 AM)

cos even for my team.... emails were flying all over right up to tues/wed

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:42:34 AM)

everyone had to much to say cos we all felt so much

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:42:38 AM)

and we only rowed ONE Race

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:42:41 AM)

you guys

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:42:50 AM)

have all the right in the world to miss rowing

I miss rowing. says: (1:45:26 AM)

june race is really the race

I miss rowing. says: (1:45:31 AM)

and this being the third and final

I miss rowing. says: (1:45:45 AM)

i'm really glad you joined db

I miss rowing. says: (1:45:53 AM)

i'm really glad to share this passion with you

I miss rowing. says: (1:46:11 AM)

its never quite the same because the people are different but really.. its the same

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:46:14 AM)

i'm really glad u told me abt db

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:46:21 AM)

cos i understand what u mean

I miss rowing. says: (1:46:44 AM)

other ppl will think we're crazy mad women

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:46:51 AM)

and i wun know what i'm missing if i didnt join

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:46:54 AM)

hahaha

I miss rowing. says: (1:46:59 AM)

like wake up early on weekends to get fried and torutred

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:47:02 AM)

then just let them think we're crazy mad women

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:47:03 AM)

hahaha

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:47:04 AM)

yes

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:47:13 AM)

wake up early to get fried

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:47:17 AM)

get into races

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:47:26 AM)

lose, cry, feel sad....

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:47:33 AM)

win, cry, feel happy

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:47:35 AM)

haha

I miss rowing. says: (1:47:47 AM)

i've never been in sucha emo sport before

I miss rowing. says: (1:47:54 AM)

no wonder they call dragonboat an extreme sport

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:47:57 AM)

hahaha

I miss rowing. says: (1:47:59 AM)

extremely emo

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:48:06 AM)

let's just say this is the first official sport i;ve been in

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:48:13 AM)

and it's as emo as i want it to be already

=) maybao-lilywong says: (1:48:17 AM)

but i love it la

I miss rowing. says: (2:07:13 AM)

haha

I miss rowing. says: (2:07:19 AM)

i thought last time netball was a team sport

I miss rowing. says: (2:07:46 AM)

and the ups n downs were v real

I miss rowing. says: (2:08:09 AM)

but aft 3 yrs of db.. the amt of tears that flowed down my cheeks can be used to soack life jacket liao la

I miss rowing. says: (2:08:16 AM)

and talk about team

I miss rowing. says: (2:08:23 AM)

db is ultimate team

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:08:38 AM)

*NODS*

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:08:54 AM)

there is no other sport where being a TEAM is more impt than anything else

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:09:34 AM)

u may have the best rowers ever... but if they decide to row with their heads and not their hearts... then everything is lost

I miss rowing. says: (2:15:53 AM)

yes

I miss rowing. says: (2:15:53 AM)

YES

I miss rowing. says: (2:15:55 AM)

OMG!!

I miss rowing. says: (2:16:01 AM)

haha

I miss rowing. says: (2:16:01 AM)

see

I miss rowing. says: (2:16:04 AM)

its the same eveyrwhere

I miss rowing. says: (2:16:19 AM)

if its not for the person in front, beside, behind.. then no point la

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:17:06 AM)

hahaha

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:17:07 AM)

yup

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:17:09 AM)

exactly

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:17:16 AM)

it's really the same everywhere la

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:17:23 AM)

and i guess the biggest thing is

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:17:28 AM)

you have to want it enough

I miss rowing. says: (2:18:30 AM)

want it enough, as a team

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:18:34 AM)

exactly

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:18:39 AM)

if not... then really no point

I miss rowing. says: (2:18:41 AM)

i miss rowing!!!!

.
.
.
.
.

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:25:32 AM)

omg

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:25:36 AM)

i just read your blog

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:25:40 AM)

goodness

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:26:09 AM)

and what struck me was the...

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:26:12 AM)

"I will miss how each stroke feels rowing with teamNUS (a feeling I fear I will never get ever again)"

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:26:23 AM)

i'm scared of going there too

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:27:26 AM)

i havent been with my team THAT long, we dun train half as hard.... but i'm scared of the day i finally put down my paddle, or my team breaks up... or if i wake up on sat/sun morning and i realise i have no team to go to and i'll never feel the same way ever again with another team

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:27:31 AM)

gooodness

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:27:45 AM)

u write the most poignant, truthful things

I miss rowing. says: (2:28:25 AM)

hey.. i feel that every team trains as hard when they train.. its just that we have more sessions.. so its going to be jsut as bad

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:28:35 AM)

hahaha

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:28:37 AM)

aiyah

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:28:42 AM)

training will increase la

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:28:49 AM)

or at least, will become more intense

I miss rowing. says: (2:28:56 AM)

so meanwhile.. cherish every stroke.. not just every set with the team

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:28:57 AM)

after the failure at june race

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:29:20 AM)

we're never packing our bags on the first day again

I miss rowing. says: (2:29:37 AM)

*jia you!

I miss rowing. says: (2:29:46 AM)

tts the dragonboater spirit

I miss rowing. says: (2:29:47 AM)

haha

I miss rowing. says: (2:30:02 AM)

and its this kinda race that makes the team stronger

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:30:22 AM)

i really hope so... but i can feel it la

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:30:28 AM)

all the emails...

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:30:32 AM)

everyone opening up

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:30:38 AM)

it's very heartening

=) maybao-lilywong says: (2:30:47 AM)

and i think we'll only get better



"u may have the best rowers ever... but if they decide to row with their heads and not their hearts... then everything is lost"


i dont know what to feel anymore... but i'll hold all your hands, and stand stronger than ever.

will u hold mine too?

@ 5:50 AM

wrote this on sat night at abt 3am? it was in point form cos i was dead tired but i didnt want to forget anything.


"race - we learnt sth... we didnt do bad i think, i believed johnson when he said it was a good set. i'm still proud of us, but i think we'll do even better in our next race...

we learnt alot, my race.... the pick up, the encouragement from the shore, felt like crying during debrief cos i thought we really did okie... but alas...

bryan... 5 mins... both teams swopping...destiny... what if?

the second boat, cheering, anxious, the worrying about our own 3rd placing

disappointed? not really i guess...

what i learnt abt my team today... the bonding during dinner, the car racing =), mac...

maybe we need to want it more... and do more.... everything was almost right, but not right too... we need more time.

see u for sava and regatta!"


till the next race la. emotions running high for me tonight, especially with the influx of emails and everything that's happening. I think it was a good wake up call for all of us. At least now we know why school teams cry so badly when they don't make it. It's all about wanting it enough and i guess we just didn't show that as a team? i dun know... too little time, too much hopes, too little commitment, too little trust, too much arrogance, too little communication?

i'm not gonna lie and say we did a fantastic job though i think those were really good sets and i haven't felt that good rowing for a while now. it felt fantastic rowing and that 4 mins and 41 seconds just whizzed by so fast.the adrenalin rush was indescribable.

but i was disappointed we could stay out late on sat and sleep in late on sun. i'd rather we had to go home immediately after dinner on sat night, be disciplined and sleep by midnight, then wake up at 9 am the next day, meet at 11 for brunch and then be at bedok again at 12 noon cos the first semi-finals start at 2 pm.

we just need to swear never to let that happen to us again. i'm not competitive, but i hate packing my bags on the first day. DUNCH LIKE. bleagh.

There were no tangible results this time, but luckily for us, this is only the beginning. 2 more big races to go... featuring our pet short-distance events.

and if anything, you guys are still perfect in my eyes. i know we gave it our all...

i saw the hope in your eyes when we came in third and you said we still had a chance.
i saw the hope in your eyes when you meticulously timed every following set just to see if we did have a chance of making it.
i saw how much u wanted to do more when you said you were almost tearing towards the final charge.
i saw how much you love the team when you started screaming from the shore knowing full well they couldn't hear you.
i saw the disappointment when you realised the team didn't make it.
i saw many things from many different people, and that keeps me going simply because i know we're still in it together as one. we want it and now we want it even more.

time to move on, pull up our socks and show everyone we're not done yet! =p

to infinity and beyond!

@ 8:01 PM

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